QUESTION
Salaams brother
Me and a sister are interested in getting married. Are we allowed to meet and talk in a public place without any guardians around? We would not be alone.^ may we meet in a public place with the permission of our guardians but not accompanied by our guardians I mean ❓❓
FATWA
Praise be to Allah.
For purpose of marriage, the boy and girl can look at each other in presence of their guardian. Seperate meeting is certainly NOT allowed.
At all times, Muslims should follow the commands of the Qur'an (24:30-31) to "lower their gaze and guard their modesty…"
Allah addressing the Mothers of the Believers:
“then be not soft in speech, lest he in whose heart is a disease should be moved with desire, but speak in an honourable manner” [al-Ahzaab 33:32].
So females are commanded to not be speaking softly if in dire need or circumstance they talk to a stranger.
Talking with a Na mehram (stranger) is haraam (forbidden) and comes under the heading of the zina (adultery) of the tongue and ears of which the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) spoke when he said:
“The son of Adam’s share of zina has been decreed for him, which he will inevitably get. The zina of the eyes is looking, the zina of the ears is listening, the zina of the tongue is speaking, the zina of the hands is touching, and the zina of the foot is walking. The heart longs and wishes, and the private part confirms that or denies it.”
Narrated by Muslim, 2657.
Our Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him said, "Not one of you should meet a woman alone unless she is accompanied by a relative (mahram)." The Prophet also reportedly said, " Whenever a man is alone with a woman, Satan is the third among them"
When young people are getting to know each other, being alone together is a considered a temptation towards wrongdoing.
Therefore if anyone intending to marry they are allowed to look each other in presence of guardian. While a seperate meeting is not allowed.
✒Mufti Abdul Rehman Qadri
16-11-2019
Rabi ul Awwal 1441